An Introduction

Hilary, Jeff,
Leila, Eddie, Jude

We are the Harris’s and we’re starting this brand new blog. It is about the grape juice of life, you know the sweet, happy, times that seem to leave their mark on your mind like a purple stain on your turtleneck.  It is also about the wrath doled out by parents who discover grape juice stains left on the couch. . . and the carpet. . . and the clothes worn by the kids who got a hold of the grape juice. You get the picture.

A gaggle is a group of geese. A school is a bunch of fish that swim together. A pride is a group of lions. And an ingratitude is a group of children, according to my dad. I am beginning to understand what he meant.

Our ingratitude is made up of Eddie (6), Leila (5), and Jude (4). 

Eddie in thug mode

Eddie goes by his middle name. His first name is Jeffrey, which is his dad’s name, and which is still consistently used by his school and dentist. He started kindergarten this year. 

Pretty Leila

Leila is named after “Layla” the Eric Clapton song, to which she knows all the words. It seems like her name should then be spelled like the name of the song. But it’s not. 

Sweet Jude

Jude is not named after anyone in particular, but my ex-husband and I agreed that a boy named Jude could be a lawyer or a snake hunter, and it would suit him either way. Jude also can sing his theme song. Can you guess what it is?

wedding day, Portland temple

Jeff is my husband of a little over 6 months now. He was in the army for almost 9 years, and now he goes to art school. He is a sculptor, but can really do anything artistic. Everything he makes is beautiful and perfect, and I attribute that to his incredible attention to detail. I am opposite of Jeff. I get bored within the first 10 minutes of a movie because I can’t be bothered with details. Just tell me what happens, and it will be over in 3 minutes, and then we can get on with doing something productive. Like facebook.

Jeff and I started dating after we were both divorced and we both had our kids full-time. Eddie and Leila are his biological children, and Jude is my biological son. We are basically the experts at dating with toddlers, so we put together these guidelines. . .

THINGS TO REMEMBER IF YOU’RE DATING WITH TODDLERS

1.  Cleaning up vomit and/or urine together is a great way to bond (and also find out if your loved one is tough enough for you)

2. If all else fails, just turn on Dora.

3. There is no limit to how many Dora episodes you can make out to

4.  If you’re worried because you haven’t heard your kid(s) making noise for a while in another room, just get on the phone with the person you’re dating, and your children will miraculously come back to life LOUDLY

5.  A good potential spouse will be understanding and laugh when he/she finds out he/she couldn’t get ahold of you because you dropped your phone in the toilet while potty training your kid.

Well, that’s it. Someone’s yelling to me from the bathroom that they need to be wiped. Stay tuned!

family cake cutting---fun danger time with little ones!